Saturday, February 6, 2010

one day at a time...

in case you haven't noticed, i'm trying to make my blog more "visually appealing." so, i did some changing things up last night...i hope you like it :) suggestions are great, as well!

ok, so i'm not going to lie, i did have sort of an ED-related moment last night.  not ED as in, restricting or something like that.  but i wanted to weigh myself for some reason, and it told me i was XXX pounds, which was what i thought.  but then for some reason, i stepped on it again, and it told me it was 3 pounds higher than that.  so i did it again to make sure, and sure enough, it kept saying the 3 pounds more.  needless to say, i was a little freaked out because i haven't seen that number since pre-ED.  i came downstairs and cried (sort of) for a little big, but then i remembered this blog, everyone here, and how great my life is without ED.  i have no desire to go back, nor do i have the urge to.  maybe a split second was there when i wanted to go back, but it was gone just like that.  my life is amazing, and a number on the scale is just that.  a number.  no one cares how much i weigh, so why should i? PLUS i'm just coming off my monthly gift, and i have put on some definite muscle mass from working out.  and of course, mom was there to remind me that NO ONE in my family has a weigh issue, and i will not have to worry about it either because i'm health conscious and i love to stay active.  i don't want anyone to think i'm regressing, i just felt like getting that off of my chest.  seriously, it lasted about 20 minutes, and i felt happy again.  minor speedbump :)  no recovery is ever perfect, and i feel so lucky that i have been blessed with the speed of mine.

despite the fact that i'm a little under the weather, i have a couple of things that have made me a very happy girl lately :)

as a HOSA officer, i got to spend all day yesterday helping with the blood drive at school.  that's me at the desk, cheezing it up.

my animal science class visits our school's hog farm twice a week.  i love it :) and jeff is coming over today so we can have a date there? yep, i live in the country.

 i got heather's package in the mail this morning! thank you soo muchhh :)
i'm definintely having some tea momentarily.

i'm trying to be more eco-friendly.  either that, or my family just won't buy plastic water bottles for me anymore :)
just realized that my picture is in the background. holla.

this has become my favorite snack ever.  frozen fruit is delicious.

except, i only like the pineapple and mango.

i was bummed i couldn't find pumpkin, but i stumbled upon some yesterday and bought TWO HUGE cans of it.  maybe it will last two weeks? :)
on a sad note,

my mother told me my greek yogurt habit was too expensive, so i'm forced to make my pumkin pie yogurt messes with slop regular yogurt.  but it's half the price, so i'll have to get used to it on a college budget this fall.

off to go veg and wait for jeff to get here! i really want to go back to sleep, but i don't really feel like being that lazy.  i want to go to the gym at some point.  

does anyone else not feel like working out normally, but want to when they are sick, but they can't? 
i think i'm just odd.

p.s. it's celebrity look-a-like week. who do you look like?  i think i look kind of like emma roberts, or at least when she was on unfabulous haha.

but my dad thinks i look like avril.


i'm not so sure...

oh p.s. number two:  formspring me :) all the cool kids are doing it.

ciao bella!


  1. I think that no matter where you are in your life you are going to have those Ed related moments. They are unavoidable.

    You do kinda look like Emma Roberts :)

    Feel better!

  2. ahh I think that type of moment is normal... as long as you don't dwell. Your rational thinking is GOOD! And you know weight fluctuates... sometimes up to like 8 pounds due to water shifts and such. You are beautiful. And I vote Emma!

  3. First off I love your new header, it's totally YOU!!

    I don't know anything about ED but I know that we all love you and your upbeat sweetie pie personality, and we are always here for you!! :)

    xo Jess

  4. omg you look so adorable in all of those pics!! and i vote for emma :] hehe.
    love the new header!! its so fun to make something new on blogger haha its like a makeover!
    i totally get where you are coming from, seeing numbers that you haven't seen since pre-ED and freaking. in fact, i had the same experience last night. but baby, you are beautiful. and it is JUST a number. we can get through this and ED does not need to be in your life. you can cope perfectly fine without him :]
    love you!

  5. "i'm trying to make my blog more "visually appealing." so, i did some changing things up last night"--girl your site looks great and i know that playin around with layouts is nerve racking b/c you never know if it's gonna "work". I have almost munched my whole layout and messed it all up so many times so i dont even try anymore.

  6. hey! you sound like my twin i sware. lol i had the same "ed" moment with the scale earlier this week and i was down for about twenty minutes but not in a way of ever wanting to go back but just not happy where im at. it passed though. i truely do think it's just a part of recovery. you're doing awesome! ps i love this song.

  7. Lindsay <3
    Firstly, I love your blog, so relaxed and happy, but truthful.
    Also, I saw the Emma Roberts pic and was so confused for a second you looked so alike :)
    Scales are for fishes, not humans! Really, I cannot tell you how many times that has happened to me, stepping on twice, letting the higher number ruin my day/week/etc. The scale and ED are ridiculous and irrational cousins, and you do not deserve to let them effect you xox

    Keep fighting!

  8. What the scale says is only a number. How you feel is so much more important. I have those moments too. When I lose weight I worry, when I gain it, I get upset! Never happy!