Monday, November 16, 2009

more pounds and more giveaways...

first off, chocolate covered katie is giving away even moreeeeeeeeeee chocolate and i want some :) here's her big fat chocolate giveaway. yummy...

so, i started taking a new medicine that has gone pretty well so far...the side effects aren't nearly as bad as my last go-around with it. but there is one thing that is kind of getting on my nerves...

I HAVE THE APPETITE OF A TEENAGE BOY.

i can't stop eating...seriously. you would think that, with me trying to gain weight, it would be a good thing. maybe it is, i don't know. i mean, i guess the rapid weight gain isn't bothering me that much, but it's just a different feeling to me, and i'm not sure what to think about it. however, i refuse to let ED come back now and tell me that i need to not listen to my new-found appetite. obviously, my body is telling me to eat more, and i'm going to honor my body by doing so, even if i get a little bit of a buddha belly.





maybe i'll get some of that wisdom along with it...?

i know this is a good thing, i really do. but i guess i still have control issues that problably caused ED in the first place, but i'm strong enough now to know that i can't let them get the best of me again.

i don't think it's the gaining weight that's bothering me...i think it's that an outside source is the cause of it, and i'm not doing it ON MY OWN.

i decided that i'm going to use this as a tool in my recovery though. it's a good exercise in letting go of my control needs, and just rolling with the punches that life throws at me.

and if i end up with that buddha belly, so be it. it's just another part of my healthy body that i will love :)


ciao bella :)


4 comments:

  1. Thanks for commenting on my blog Lindsey! Yup, Calculus is a TOTAL drag, but we just have to make it through this last year and then we're off to college! :)

    Glad to hear the medication is helping you out, though I can imagine how stressful it is to have such an appetite as a side-effect. Just stay strong and remember that YOU are always in charge!

    xxoo
    Heather

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  2. calculus is a NIGHTMARE. mine is all year...is yours? i've always been good at math, so this is definitely new for me haha. where are you wanting to go to college?

    and thank you so much for the support, it means so much :)

    ciao bella!

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  3. You're a beautiful girl Lindsey!
    I have the appetite of a teenage boy as well, I think I could out-eat any boy my age if I wanted to ;)
    Have a good week,
    xx Katie

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  4. thank you veryy much!
    i think seconds are calling me as we speak ;)

    ciao bella!

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