Wednesday, June 16, 2010

so this is what it's like

as of approximately 7:00 last night, i became a high school graduate;  an adult in the real world.  my childhood is officially behind me, and i'm about to embark on MY new life without my family. about surreal. 

the ceremony was amazing.  ever since 9th grade, i had been number on in my class, but things changed that the VERY last second and i was salutatorian in the end.  last second as in i was still valedictorian up until two weeks ago.  oh well...i was upset at first, but it's really no big deal. with everything i've been through, i know i'm lucky to be where i am today.  i may have not been the best student either, so i know i should definitely be happy with being second in the class.

a lot has changed since the last time i've posted.  i've become so much more lackadasical about my food choices.  i eat pretty poorly at times, but i've now found the motivation to exercise and live a healthy, balanced lifestyle.  honestly, i've never been happier.  i don't know how much i weigh and i don't care too.  when i go to the doctor to get my immunizations for college, i intend of having them not tell me what it is.  life is so much easier when living blindy, sometimes.  words really can't describe how lucky i consider myself.  i continue to read blogs of girls still stricken with an eating disorder, and i think about how i know exactly where they are. because i've been there, too.  i want them to read this and know that it is possible to recover.  i'm here where i am today because of the outpouring of strength and love given to me by my family and friends around me, as well as my own personal power that i never knew i had. 

on a lighter note, there is a new boy in my life.  a great one, at that.  unfortunately, i won't see him all summer because he is in the army national guard, and will be at basic training all summer. ugh. at least he will be at N.C. State with me in August, though :)

i start work tomorrow as a waitress, so wish me luck guys!
now that i'm an adult and all, i gotta bring in that bankk ;)

ciao bella

“If you can imagine it, you can achieve it; if you can dream it, you can become it.”


  1. you and your bf are too cute together! :D And CONGRATS!!!!

  2. this post almost made me cry. you are so strong girl, and i am so proud of how far you have come. it is truly inspirational to read how well you are doing. CONGRATS ON BEING SECOND!! that is such an honor. don't think of it as a letdown :] I'm 13th and PROUD! Hehe.

  3. I just found this blog, but I will definitely go back and read posts- I just randomly happened to read the post about your healthy eating plan, and it resonates with me soooo much! I too feel the need to get a grip of my eating- not in an ED kind of way but just to feel better. Like you write, it's easy to just eat poorly because your ED justifies it... Congratulations on the graduation and on your many other great successes!