i did it...i lost my virginity!

GREEN MONSTER VIRGINITY!! bwhahaha...:) my blender finally decided to work!! miracles do happen!

it was every bit as awesome as i had read about. mine included a couple of handfuls of spinach, a cup of almond milk, a frozen banana, and 5 or 6 strawberries. i love how the specks of strawberries make it look festive.

christmas in a cup :)

in other news, i still don't feel very good from my little escapade saturday night. i really never want to see alcohol again. blehh.

i also spent two hours in wal-mart trying to get jeff's christmas present, but i finally have it in my hand; however, since he reads this blog (hi loser =]), i cannot divulge what i purchased. it's kind of an inside joke thing. very corny :) i also picked up some ingredients to make peppermint patties for his mom for christmas...it was the first thing on my list of things to bake in the next few days before...

I'M GOING TO PENNSYLVANIA!! woooooooo :) after all of that confusion and going back and forth, i'm finally going! i can't wait to play in the snow all day with jeff and his family.

time for some big bang theory!

ciao bella

beer before liquor...

wow i feel like i haven't written anything in forever! maybe because i haven't felt exactly like writing the past few days...

i guess i'm just a little irritated right now. i was originally going to georgia with my family for christmas, but my mother decided to stay home. i was excited because that meant i could go to pennsylvania with jeff, but as soon as i told him i could go, mom turned around and decided we were going again so i had to cancel. now she just told me we aren't going to georgia now. what the hell? i already felt like an ass telling jeff's family i was going last minute, then cancelling, i'm NOT making another big deal about it now. i guess i'll just stay home and everyone else can have fun...ughh.

sorry i had to vent that out...but other than tonight, this week has been wonderful! with maybe the exception of last night and this morning. i may or may not have gone to a party last night and had my first experience with alcohol. let me just say, i do not recall half of the nights events. i mean i had fun when i wasn't bad off, but i just don't see why people go drink all of the time and get drunk and throw up. it's not exactly fun and i'm still feeling it tonight. i did enjoy being around people i love and having a good time though. it's been awhile since i've been out with a bunch of people :)

back up a couple of days and i went to the gym to do this circuit workout. i figured it would just be an easy, quick workout. NOT. the twenty minute workout turned into seventy-five minutes. but i loved it! i accidentally doubled the amount of walking lunges and deadlifts though, and i think that's why i've had a hard time walking today. i just finished up polly's yoga for upper thighs video and it did magical things for my legs :) thanksssssss!

mom wants to go to the gym with me tomorrow to do that same workout, but i'm not sure my legs will be up to the task. i think i might stick with arms or something. anyone happen to know any good arm workouts?

alsoooooo on the mind, i'm making a very special "hippie-food" lunch (his name for my food) for jeff and i tuesday, and i'm trying to find something different to make that will amaze him :) we have golf on the schedule after that, and i'm super excited to see how that plays out bwhahaha.

time for me to hit the hayy! maybe i'll blog more than once a week from now on :)

ciao bella!

"For every minute you are angry you lose sixty seconds of happiness."-Ralph Waldo Emerson

i started writing a post last night...a rather angry one at that...concerning my mother and i. nothing ED related, but i was shaking i was so upset. i really don't feel like rehashing it again, but i figured i didn't want to put it up here for people to potentially see my dumb venting. this is, after all, an ED recovery blog...not stupid arguments blog :) toooooooo the food!

yep...i tried the infamous "oats in a jar." honestly, i figured it was hyped up to be something spectacular, but i didn't think it would be that amazing.....hahaha i was wrong :)

it was delicious. on a scale of 1-10 it was like a 10.456 :) i made up the normal pumpkin oats last night with:

-1/3 cup oatmeal
-1 cup water
~1/2 cup pumpkin
-cinnamon, nutmeg, ginger
-vanilla
-drizzle of maple syrup

soo this morning i put it in the jar and added some wheat germ and a few dark chocolate chips on top that got all melty and gooeyyyyyyyyy

:

...eventually...

off the food, i'm still beyond excited about college. i got my "official" acceptance letter in the mail today!

yeah...i changed my major already.

anyways, i'm off to finish up more calculus...joy to the worlddddddddd!

ciao bella :)

"only you can set you free"

not much to talk about today...life has been amazing lately :) time with the boyfriend, accepted to college...can't get much better than that! i feel like i'm finally getting past this stupid ED, and my life is going forward. a new chapter is about to begin, WITHOUT ED :)))

i've also been to the gym a couple of times, trying to get my energy back and its working! i feel so great!

so, here are a couple pictures to share:

post gym: 3 miles in 3o min. (intervals) and 30 min. strength training!



ruby tuesday :) salad bar, what whatttt!



lighting the tree with jeff!



jeff, me, and my "niece"...love it.

anyways...i'm off to a date with calculus! oh the joys of being a senior. but at least i can see college in my future now!!!!!!!!!! ahh i'm so excited :)

ciao bella :)

red and white?!

I GOT ACCEPTED TO N.C. STATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



"the walking professor."

that is all :)

ciao bella!!!

"It is time for every one of us to roll up our sleeves and ut ourselves at the top of our commitment list." - Marian Wright Edelman

this morning started out kind of rushed (i woke up 20 minutes late!), but ended up having a pretty good day anyways. i had plans to go out with a couple of my friends this evening, but i have been a little apprehensive all day about it, and decided to cancel. i'm just not comfortable hanging out with them after they decided it was cool to smoke pot...sorry, its just not my thing.

i came home from school a little irritable, so i decided to hit up the gym, per doctor's orders. i was told to exercise at least 3x a week to keep my mood up and other unmentionables, but i just haven't. i figured today would be a good time to start, and i'm really glad that i did. i ran 30 minutes on the treadmill and did about 15 minutes of strength training. my treadmill run was in intervals (4.5 mph and 6.5 mph.) i think i ended up running around three miles or something like that. i felt AMAAAAAAZING afterwards. it has been so long since i have been allowed to have a decient work out, i forgot the feeling you get afterwards. it tends to magically make all of your troubles disapper :) however, during my run, i kept getting light-headed and i wasn't sweating even though i was tired and definitely getting a work out. anyone know why?? i mean, i feel fine so i'm not that worried, but i'm curious about it.

dinner tonight (so far, i've been munching) was a large sweet potato with cinnamon and peanut butter and some blue corn chips and hummus. deeeeeeeelicious :) jeff and i are definitely going to have to figure out meals when we live together because we are on opposite ends of the food spectrum :) i still love you regardless! :) and you will try hummus soon bwhahahhaaaaaaa.

and on the TMI side, i'm trying to figure out what is currently causing my digestive issues. it's just getting worse. fortunately, cutting dairy out has made most of the pain go away, but the bathroom problem is getting worse. i always have to make sure one is close by, or something awful could happen...and its starting to happen at school which is slightly embarrassing. if anyone happens to read this and maybe knows something that would help, i would loveeeee to hear something.

i'm turning in early tonighttttttt :) i'm starting to freak out about collegee! i'm supposed to get my decision from n.c. state tuesday night at 7 p.m.! :)

yep, that's me standing in the belltower.

ciao bella :)

"When you love your body, you are most able to share its pleasures with those who light your heart." - Huitaco

this will be a short post for three reasons:

1. THE FRINGE IS ON!!! a.k.a. greatest show to ever grace my television.
2. my parents are wandering tonight and i despise hovering.
3. i still haven't started that poetry explication i have been talking about for three days now.

gah the fringe is such a wonderful, crazy, you-have-to-be-a-freak-to-enjoy-it kind of show :) it's so out there i love it! and i'm not even a sci-fi kind of girl.

second, my parents do not know about this blog, nor do i intend on them finding out. it's nothing that i feel like i don't want them to know about me, but i would just rather have this as my own personal outlet to share my feelings and talk to people.

third...well...we shall see if it ever gets finished.

also, i had my last clinical today at our local "mental health home." i have been doing physical therapy for my clinicals, and i absolutely love it! i really didn't think i would enjoy working with people with disorders, but i love it and i don't want to leave. i stayed a little longer than i was scheduled today so i could talk to my supervisor about different things, and he really made me realize that people like me for me and not for what i look like. they like me for who i am. he told me that i was the first student he had ever had that would look him in the eye, have a real conversation with him, take an interest in what he had to say, cared for the patients, wanted to learn, and just HAD FUN. i was really taken back by what he said, and it completely made my day/week.

all in all, it has been a great day! must have been those apple cider oats that made it wonderful, right? :)

wish me luck on my paper! i'm not an english major by any means!

jeff and i at the aforementioned rise against concert! thankfully someone else thought to bring their camera :)

ciao bella :)